MOFO Day #4 True Grub: Terry's Red Eye Gravy n' Grits

Now you get to see several recipes unified in one delicious ceremony which I have nicknamed Merlotte's Red Plate Special. When you ask Sam to fry up some ham, Gram to bring her beans n' ham, and Terry who's mentally on the fritz to bring the gravy n' grits, well--that is something that Dr. Seuss can write a book about.
Just look at that, three awesome dishes gossiping in harmony.
Terry Bellefleur. Terry-Terry-Terry. I absolutely adore him. Did you know when this lovable cup of crazy isn't slingin' hash at the bar, he is writing his own Southern vegan cookbook and testing his recipes on Arlene? True story. I was talking with him this morning about Gilmore Girls re-runs over a giant plate of the aforementioned Merlotte's Red Plate Special. What a cutie pie.

Now back to reality. I'm sitting in front of the computer in my makeshift pajamas analytically toiling over how I'm supposed to convince you this is old skool red eye gravy. Sadly, it isn't--but don't run away, it IS GRAVY. Greasy, salty, and glorious gravy praise Jeebus. The signature moniker of red eye comes from pouring the coffee in the pork drippings to have your skillet look like a giant eyeball. Louisiana RE Gravy is usually made with roast beef and a chicory coffee. Seriously, who needs culinary school when you can just look stuff up on Wikipedia?

Since I'm BFF with Wilbur and Babe, I skipped the pork drippings by using this recipe. I'm sure it could be better, but I think it's pretty good, and you have to give yours Jewly some cred for having the chutzpah to create something she has never made or even tried. Boo-yah.

Terry's Red Eye Gravy n' Grits

You'll need:

• A couple of big pieces of Sam's Shape Shifter Ham
• 2T AP flour
• 3/4 c. strong coffee-(preferably day old) I was in a pinch and prepared a cup of (ACK!) instant coffee.
• 1 c. of Sam's Shape Shifter ham puree*-(remember the floaty bits and left over stock from the recipe? Did you listen to me and keep it? Good. Now throw that in a blender until smooth.)
• 1 t chili powder
• 2T vegan butter
• 3T canola oil
• 1/2 t salt (or more) to taste
• 1/4 c. finely chopped onions
• a few turns of fresh black pepper
• A couple of portions of cooked grits

Melt that butter and saute those onions on medium heat, Don't let the crackling sound remind you of the war zone. Add the chili powder and canola oil, throwing the ham steaks in and fry the shit out of them. Once the ham is good n' crispy, take it out and put in a warm oven. Where in the hell is my coffee? Put that in the skillet, then add the ham puree. Add the 2T flour last. Don't think you can mix up the order of stuff--I'm watching you.

Pour the gravy over prepared grits and on top of your ham. Serve with Gram's Ham & Beans if you please.