Now, wouldn't the epic thriller Carrie have been more of a heart touching tale of overcoming adversity if her mother had simply made a plate of Peanut Butter Pillows from Vegan Cookies Invade Your Cookie Jar instead of letting her go to the prom? Think about it, she would have taken a couple of bites, said to her momma,
"You know what? Screw those bullies. In 20 years they'll be washed out and still living here in Anytown. I'm gonna use my telekinesis to bank big in Vegas. You can stay here and read the bible. Keep making awesome cookies, ma."
You wouldn't have to see the buckets of blood or fire. Instead you'd just see Sissy Spacek rolling around in hundreds on her bed from Circus Circus. Her mom would decide to start going to Buddhist retreats, and everything would be dandy.
That's how awesome these cookies are.